three things.

so i'm struggling with not freaking out moving into this new place. i always have a difficult adjusting to a new place/moving somewhere, so i knew this would happen. just a matter of dealing with how i'm feeling right now and switching this doubt/stress i'm feeling into hope and excitement of starting out here and knowing i'm going to be here for the next few years. so i'm copying churchie's idea of writing three GOOD things from the day that i'm thankful/happy for. as much as i don't like to admit it, i tend to think more negatively when i'm stressed/freaking out. i'm working on it. so here it goes...

1. i absolutely LOVE the area i am living in, it is perfect to run in. it's got tons of pretty trees, lots of cool streets to explore with cool old houses. and most of all, TONS of fellow runners! i passed probably 20 runners today on my run and i love it. i love seeing people when i run. it makes me feel a lot better running, especially if i don't particularly want to go out and run.
2. i love love love the bebe that i am nannying for (and the parents). she is such a sweetheart. i feel so blessed to have found them...they have made transitioning to cincinnati so much easier and always am offering to do things for me. they are amazing.
3. my books...i unpacked all my books today (most of them) in my little apartment and realized how happy books make me. i know, call me a dork, but i LOVE them. i want a super awesome bookcase someday (or library) where i can put ALL my books in one place. that would make me super happy.

that's all for now. i'll try to update more frequently, but we'll see how that goes. i'm ready for cool, fall weather...hopefully the end of this week!

all moved in.

so i'm all moved in (furniture and all) to my apartment. or room...whichever you prefer. it's a little bigger than i thought it would feel with all my furniture (what little i have) in there, but it still doesn't feel like a place i'm going to be living in for the next year. i hope it will once i unpack and attempt to decorate a little and hang pictures up. i feel panicky when i'm in there though feeling like i do NOT want to live there for a full year because it doesn't feel anything like home...so i hope i feel better about it soon. i still feel like i made a good choice and it was a blessing with the price of it for now...and the location. as most of you know, i struggle with change, trying to embrace it more than resisting it though...i think my life would be a lot less stressful if i did.

my good friend and soulmate, morgan, gave me this quote which i really liked (even if it was from grey's anatomy!): it's the way people try not to change that is unnatural. the way we cling to what things were, instead of letting them be what they are. the way we cling to old memories instead of forming new ones. change is constant. how we experience change, that's up to us. it can feel like death or it can feel like a second chance to life. if we open our fingers, loosen our grip and go with it, it can feel like pure adrenaline.

i'll post some pics once things get organized a little bit! on a funnier note, i've gotten a couple "congratulations!" when i've been out at starbucks with adele...people thinking she's mine! i just smile and reply, "thank you!" haha. i mean, i'm totally old enough...just not there yet. hopefully they think i've gotten back into shape incredibly fast though!! :)

life in cinci.

so i've been trying to change the look of my blog, but i have realized i'm not very good at designing webpages even when they try to make it easy for you. so we'll see what happens. this is week number two of nannying and being down here. i feel like i'm settling into things and feeling less anxious about everything in general, which is a good thing for my well being, i tend to worry about too much. i've found a couple studio apartments that, although they are tiny, are within my price range and in nice areas. the one i am leaning towards is in hyde park and has GREAT areas around it to run in...which is something i really want, to be able to walk outside and just go for a run without driving anywhere. i think jordan may be sick of me talking about how the places i've looked at are good or aren't good for running in :)

i'm enjoying being able to hang out and do normal things with j! it's been so nice. we grilled out turkey burgers and grilled summer squash that we bought at a farmer's market today...it was amazing! and we ran 9.5 miles this morning. we have been running a lot downtown across bridges and by the riverfront which has been beautiful! i'm so happy he's sticking it out with me and running a half...it means a lot to me! i'm excited to start my second week with beautiful Adele, she is just so cute. is it possible to love her already and i've only been with her a a week?!

miss amber pagano, oops, i mean hildebrand, had baby Lily Anne this week and i'm just so stinkin excited for team hildebrand. she is absolutely beautiful and i'm so thankful she's here safely and is healthy. hooray for babies and the Lord's blessing of new life. it really is incredible how He creates new life and how He knows who these tiny little people inside and out even before they're born. i can't believe she's a mama...but she's going to be a fabulous mama and i can't wait to see Lily grow. she is so blessed. congrats you guys! love and blessings your way!

first day!

today was my first day nannying and it went so well! megan (the mom) stayed home with me today so i could learn adele's schedule a little bit more, so basically i just hung out with her all day and got to know her a little bit more. and she is hilarious, i love her! i got to hold and feed baby adele today too and she is just the cutest little thing ever. she was all smiles and laughs the whole time. the only thing is that she projectile vomits. a lot...which is gross, but i'll take baby barf over a screaming baby any day. megan drove me around the mt lookout area where they live and over to hyde park which is a great area! i was able to write down numbers of different apartments that were listed on signs in front yards...so keep your fingers crossed, i'm hoping to find a nice place in that area so i can walk places!

i'm feeling so much better about being here and the decision to move. finally really feeling hopeful about things. this family i'm nannying for has a lot to do with it, they are such a blessing. i also met a nurse practitioner who works in a neurology department at children's-exactly where i want to be! not that i'm looking for a job yet, i really want to focus on nannying for the time being and committing to this family for a while before i look elsewhere for a job. i feel like this blog is boring...hopefully i'll have some more adventures now that i'm in a new city.

surprises.

well i made it to cincinnati, i guess kentucky to be more specific. i met with a few apartment complexes on friday with not much luck. one was so-so, they other was yucky. i spent a little bit of time with the family i am nannying with and they showed me the house, where everything was, etc. the mom is taking monday off to spend with me to learn adele's schedule which will be good. she also offered to drive me around to look for apartments. they are so great! still stressing out a bit about finding a decent place that i can afford...trying to be patient.

i went to church today with brent (jordan's roommate) and met his girlfriend, elizabeth, and her parents. i was talking to elizabeth's mom who happens to be a nurse practitioner at cincinnati children's hospital!! she was telling me she works with spinal tubular defects (i think?) and she works with dietitians who do the ketogenic diet...and i said, that's EXACTLY what i want to do!!! i was telling her about my experience in detroit and how i love working with the neurology population. i'm hoping to follow up with her and maybe something will come of this down the road! she was going to find out who does the hiring in the nutrition department so hopefully i can send my resume directly to someone. pray please!

so anyways, God has already managed to surprise me and i've only been her a few days. i don't know why i'm so surprised, or why i freak out so much because He really does provide in every way possible...even when you have absolutely NO clue when or where He is going to come through next. nannying tomorrow and j comes back tomorrow night too! yay! i'm excited to get into the swing of things here.

i'm back.

ok, going to give this thing another whirl. we'll see how it goes.

so i'm two days away from moving to cincinnati. for those of you who know me, i do not do well with change. and although i've been waiting for this (and praying) time, i'm sitting here in my sister's room amidst my failed attempts to pack, wishing i had another week at home. today i think it truly hit me that i am 98% most likely not going to be moving back home home. i'm moving to cincinnati for the next three years of my life. and after that, i will be married and moving somewhere else, with my own family and my own home. don't get me wrong, i am super excited about building my own family and getting married, but for right now, the thought of not ever living here in the only home i've ever known, is hard on this heart. and i'm really sad. i love the comforts of this place. even though i'd go crazy living here much longer, i enjoy being with my family. having tina and dave make me dinner and eating out back together with my puppies. i'm so blessed with the family and home i have. i'm going to miss it. a lot.

but...i'm ready for this new season that i'm stepping into. i really have felt for a while that i truly am stepping into something new and big. i think this is going to be an awesome time for jordan and i's relationship, being in the same place. it's time. and i know the Lord is in this and He is walking through this time with me. it's going to be exciting and new and an adventure with my best friend but it also feels like i'm closing a chapter in my life. obviously my family and home will always be there, but just not how i'm used to. i AM ready for this. and i can do it. it's just going to be an emotional next couple of days. surprise surprise! prayers are appreciated.

life.

lots of things have happened the past couple of weeks! this past weekend was tay's graduation party and it was SO fun! my family from michigan and chicago all came and we had a BLAST. granted it was miserably hot and humid during the party...but aside from that it was perfect. baby adeline was here and we got to spend some time with her, most of have not seen her since she was itty bitty. i loooove babies!!! KIND of makes me want one...but not quite there yet. gotta get something first before i can think about that ;)

i have decided to move to cincinnati this fall (early september) regardless of if i have a job or not. i have been going back and forth with this and it has been a major stressor in my life. but i decided that i just can't move back home and get stuck there. cincinnati is where i want to be and if i have to get a job at starbucks until i find a job as a dietitian, i'm going to do it. i was freaking out about making this decision and asked God after i decided to move that a teeny tiny affirmation that this is OK for me to do, that He is still behind me in this move, would be MUCH appreciated. and i got it!!! i wrote on my facebook wall i was looking for a roommate and literally THAT night a girl i knew from miami wrote back and said she was looking for someone too! i met her through crusades and she's really nice. she was freaking out too about finding a roommate. THEN last night, she got forwarded an email from a friend that was from my bible study leader who had emailed a bunch of people asking around for a roommate for me. how crazy is that?? so i said, ok God. not that i didn't trust Him before, it was just nice to know i'm doing ok.

so my dear friend colby sent me this book called practical theology for women: how knowing God makes a difference in our daily lives by wendy horger alsup. it is EXCELLENT. you should get it and read it. i found it for $10 online (shipping included) if you want to buy it, lemme know and i'll give you the website!

"we have God's precious promise that He's going to work the hard things in our lives for our good, and part of that good is that we will be changed more and more to reflect Christ's character and glory. the trials and struggles we experience are like the refiner's fire under a pot of gold. the heat brings the impurities to the top to be scraped off by the refiner, leaving the gold in a purer form." pg 36

this is what i hope He's doing with me during this season i am in....